When You Try to Prevent Your Children From All Suffering, You’re Blocking them from God’s Will and His Working in Their Life
When you try to keep your children from experiencing any trials or suffering in their life, did you realize you block your children from the will of God? Jesus said, “These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.” John 16:33
Am I expecting an easy life for myself and my children? Am I seeking for–pursuing, desperate for, thinking I deserve–a more pleasant, smooth-sailing life? The Bible says that Jesus learned obedience through the things which He suffered. So, do I expect to learn obedience another way? Jesus was a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief.
I know I’m guilty of this. I totally want a cushy life. (As the apostle Paul said, Now I speak as a fool.) I am tired of trials, and I certainly don’t want my kids to have to go through anything. I want them to learn from my mistakes, and not sin or go through what I did, cuz I had to learn things the hard way too much of the time. I want them to learn from my mistakes and not make the same ones, and stand on my shoulders and go from there!
“Yes, quite honestly, I would prefer my children to live a pain-free life. If I was running the world, that’s how it’d be. But, that’s not God’s will. Knowing that changes my goals for my children. I want them to love the Lord with all their heart and bear spiritual fruit instead of having an easy life.” Wendy Gunn
When You Watch Your Children Suffer
Yes, quite honestly, I would prefer my children to live a pain-free life. If I was running the world, that’s how it’d be. But, that’s not God’s way. Knowing that changes my goals for my children. I want them to love the Lord with all their heart and bear spiritual fruit instead of have an easy life. I’ve still been known to dive in front of them to protect them whenever a curve ball comes their way.
Physically, I did try to prevent them from suffering pain. Much more when they were very small. It is what a mother does. Up to a point, yes. Then, I met some wonderful Godly families, and they were much more knowledgeable about raising Godly boys, especially!
I should say they knew how to raise boys to become men. Do I prevent my son from doing anything that is a little bit risky? No. How do I react when they do get bruises or fall? I learned not to make a big fuss over every little cut and bruise and pain. I learned how to raise a Godly man.
Raising Boys to Become Men Who Don’t Fear Danger and Aren’t Afraid to Take Risks
From a purely worldly standpoint, we need to teach our children to toughen-up. Especially our boys! Living a life for Jesus is not about taking the easy way, or the path with no problems. It’s not always without risk or danger! Our children need to be taught that obedience to God will be learned through suffering.
They have to learn to depend on God, pray about what He wants them to do, and then obey. Doing hard things is mandatory. Working hard and being uncomfortable, building both physical and spiritual muscle, is imperative.
As a parent, knowing God will take care of them, and protect them, we pray as though it all depends on us, and know it’s in God’s hands. He will allow them to suffer sometimes. He will allow them to get hurt. God will teach them through trials. God is Sovereign, and knows what’s best for all of us.
10 Tips for Accepting Suffering As Part Of A Christian’s Life
- Read God’s Word with a humble, God-fearing heart of repentance.
- Pray for direction about everything.
- Listen to the direction of the Holy Spirit and obey His Word.
- Trust Him to protect you and safeguard your life.
- Pray as though it all depends on you, but have faith, knowing your life is in God’s Hands.
- Teach your children about the Sovereignty of God, His Love and His Wisdom and live as though you believe what you teach.
- Know that there will be suffering and trials and don’t look at them as signs that you’re out of God’s will, necessarily.
- Keep your destination of Heaven always in mind, looking for the return of Jesus.
- Prioritize your spiritual life over your physical, and emotional well-being, pursuing love for God and others and spiritual fruit.
- Thank God in everything, knowing that this is the will of God for you, in Christ Jesus.
When Going Through Suffering, Show What To Do
As parents, we must teach, train, and be a Godly example, always praying. Looking to God, through prayer and study of the Word, believing He will direct our path, we calmly go forward. When I lose my peace and panic, I must show my children by example, what to do, by asking forgiveness. I must return to Christ–sit at Jesus’ feet–and regain my peace.
Emotionally, when my preschooler, tween or teen feels offended, wronged, ignored or brokenhearted by someone’s actions or words, I hurt with them. How, though, do I teach them to deal with it? How do I teach them to gain spiritual growth through what they’re suffering? What do I do? What should I do?
“God does not give a smooth, carefree ride to believers. Old or New Testament. The Bible is full of messy stories.” Wendy Gunn
We must tell our children the Truth from God’s Word. Send them to God’s Word. If you read God’s Word, you will see that God does not give a smooth, carefree ride to believers. Old or New Testament.
The Bible is full of messy stories. Unfortunately, much sin. A few really great examples, who even God and Jesus praise! “Have you seen my servant Job?” God said. But, look at the trials HE suffered. And, Jesus Himself.
God did not spare His Own Son from suffering. If this world was all there is, it would be a sad story! But, this world and this life is so short, and not our eternal home! We must focus on the spiritual journey and our destination.
Loving our children means to turn them to Jesus for comfort and help. Children must learn from a very young age to pray and to trust Jesus to help them. We mustn’t promote resentment, bitterness, or a spirit of questioning and doubt in them.
When you Block Your Children from the Will of God
As a mom, do not encourage self-pity in your children, by saying, “You poor thing!” and whisking them up into your arms every time something happens to them! Even from a young age. There’s a time for that, but, we take it to the extreme.
We need to prioritize our spiritual relationship with the Lord, not expect an easy life, and realize that obedience is learned through suffering. Not elevate our worldly experience, as though that’s all there is! This is not our home! Heaven is our home.
When I put God first, when I make a commitment to reading God’s Word and praying, I find Him faithful.
The Ordinary Suffering of Not Knowing How to Get It All Done
As I was raising my family and so busy, (I’m still busy!) I would often wonder how I was going to get it all done. I know you do, too. It’s one of the main things young moms talk to me about. We older moms still have that problem.
When I begin worrying, often, as I pray, I find that that thing I worried about not getting done disappears. When I think, “How on earth is this week going to work?” I trust God, and prioritize my spiritual relationship, not neglecting the Word and prayer, and God just works it out. How?
Something will get canceled or postponed, due to sickness (or a snowstorm! I live in Minnesota), or someone will take one of my commitments or responsibilities for me, (a husband or a friend). I’ll get a call that the person doesn’t need me anymore. Somehow, some way, God works it out.
Prioritizing Your Spiritual Life
Because I am way too busy, I have to choose my priorities. Life isn’t going to slow down. When I prioritize my spiritual life, and put God first, honor my commitment to spend time with Him, God makes everything else fall into place.
I don’t have time, but God takes my meager time that I do have–says, “What’s in your hand?”– and, like the little boy with the fish and loaves, I offer Him my broken crumbs of bread and my fragments of fish–and He multiplies them.
He not only feeds me, but others. He not only accomplishes what I was setting out to accomplish, but He does spiritual work in and through me that I hadn’t a clue about doing. Where I have no time, now I have enough to give away to others.
In the time I take to spend with God, He fills me with peace and puts praise and joy in my heart. I know He is there with me. He gives me a testimony to share with others of His provision, power, and blessing, just as I’m doing with you now.
When You Block Your Children From Suffering, You Block Them From God’s Will
It is not God’s will for us to sail through life with nothing going wrong. Having no difficulties. Setting goals and priorities and succeeding at everything you aim to accomplish! It does not mean you’re out of God’s will when your day does not turn out the way you’d planned.
You are teaching your children about God and how to live a devoted relationship with Him, as you throw up your hands and ask Him, “What now, Lord?”
As you seek His direction, heed His correction, pray about everything, ask forgiveness of your husband and them, when you sin, and are getting guidance for all you do from the Word, you’re pointing the way to Christ. This is the path of life with Christ.
God’s Writing Your Children’s Life Story Through Their Trials and Triumphs
Your individual life and that of your family–as your story is lived out day-by-day–is going to be SO UNIQUE! One of a kind, as God writes it!
The trials, unique problems, mistakes and circumstances, sickness, issues you face, etc., that He allows–and sends–to your life–to shape and to conform you to His will and the image of His Son–are not going to match up to anyone else’s. They make up a story that is singularly yours! This is your message to the world, from Him, of His faithfulness, power and Love.
Am I a Soldier of the Cross? Will I float through life on a bed of ease? As the hymn says.(words to the hymn)
When I block my children from all suffering and trials, I am blocking them from God’s will. God teaches us through trials and suffering.
Is It God’s Will For My Children To Suffer
Am I trying to keep my children from experiencing any trials or suffering? Is that really God’s will? No. When I block my children from all suffering and trials, I am blocking them from God’s will. God teaches us through trials and suffering.
Teach, train, be an example. Tell your children the Truth from His Word. Turn them to Him. It’s not about taking the easy way, the path with no problems. Obedience to God will be learned through suffering.
What’s Next in This Series
Next, we’ll be talking about How to Study the Bible and How to Pray. I’m so excited about this! We have to prepare for trials and give our children the tools to deal with life, when it comes. We’ll talk about some of the great tools God’s given us, that, as parents, we have the privilege and responsibility to train our children to use.
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