Consistency, Prioritizing, and How You Can Stop Struggling With Them
Inconsistency and Perfectionism
My struggle with inconsistency for so many years stemmed back to my thought that I was expected to be perfect and do everything perfectly. I thought there was a level of perfection I could attain, and I thought that others expected me to attain it. I felt judged for not living up to an arbitrary standard (perhaps made up in my head) and I kept spinning my wheels trying to do all the things, please everyone, and live up to what I thought others’ expectations were of me. Consistency takes perfection and sets it aside. I learned systems and developed a mindset to help me do this. First, I found out an important truth: God created me (and you!) uniquely! I am not expected to walk someone else’s path, to be them, or to do what they do! God has a singular and unique path for me, and that’s not only good, it’s great!
God Uniquely Created You
People-watching is a favorite pastime of mine. I am fascinated by the uniqueness of people. I love meeting people! I love meeting people from other locations–states, cities–and other countries, especially. Our family’s trip to Europe in 2018 was so fun! It struck me as I watched people on that trip how uniquely-created each and every person is, and that they each have a life story. Each person has people who love them, a family, triumphs and trials that they’ve experienced. God made no two people alike. He had a reason for creating you the way He did! He gave you the dreams and desires you have, and He has a purpose for you to please and glorify Him.
Trying to live up to someone else’s idea of perfection is not God’s plan for you.
Do You Have A Dream Deep in Your Heart? Here Are 3 Things To Do:
- Check Scripture to make sure your dream doesn’t violate God’s Word
- Surrender your dream to the LORD
- Give your expectations to God, so that if your dream comes true, you’re thankful, and if it doesn’t, you’re thankful, knowing that God knows what’s best for you, and has, in that case, withheld it for a reason. Psalm 62: “My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him.”
Do you wonder why you can’t be consistent? Wonder what is important to prioritize? Have you been looking at your friends and thinking that what they have and do looks pretty good, and you have tried to copy them? Or maybe you feel bad because you aren’t doing all the things they are doing, which they seem to be doing so well? Are you all messed up, off track, going around in circles, starting over and over again trying to get it perfect, starting but never finishing, not sure what you should be prioritizing, and so exhausted?
Reasons Why You Struggle With Prioritizing
I’ve been where you are. But, God has been teaching me. When I was on this miracle trip with my family and we were in Rome, at the Coliseum, the Pantheon, the Vatican, and St. Peter’s Basilica, the crowds were astonishing. There were people from all over the world, speaking so many different languages! It was a people-watcher’s dream:) Watching crowds of travelers at airports and tourist sites, it hit me that every single person I saw was uniquely created by God and known intimately by Him.
It is staggering to think that in all the world there is no one just like me. Or you. Let that sink in.
God Made You Uniquely and God Decided These Unchangeable Characteristics/Facts About You:
- Your place of birth
- Your parents
- Your siblings
- Your birth order
- Your ethnicity
- Your time to live in history
- Your gender (yes, you are either male or female–“God created them male and female” it says in the Bible in Genesis–so according to God’s Word, which is Truth, you are male or female!”
- Your design: appearance, build color of hair, color of eyes, etc.
- Your gifts and talents
- Your length of days
You have uniquely-created gifts and talents, dreams and desires. There are gifts and talents you have and there are uniquely-created things you’re not good at. We all have them. (Of course you can learn skills, and develop your talents, but you are wired a certain way inside.) God also created you with a purpose, priorities, and a reason for living and they are different, based on all these uniquely-created characteristics from anyone else. Add to that the fact that you are in a family of uniquely-created individuals, and you can easily see that your family is completely unique! This is why I say often, “Don’t copy someone else’s life!”
Want to Know Your Priorities? Go to Your Creator!
God decided all these unchangeables in you, and He did so for a reason! As you try to decide what you’re supposed to do with your life, your year, or your day, the logical One to ask about it is your Loving Heavenly Father, Who created you! Want to know your Priorities, and Be Consistent in what matters? Talk to your Creator about it!
God uniquely created you and me. We don’t have to look at anyone else and copy them. God has a unique and amazing purpose for the uniquely-created person He made you to be. And it begins with His desire that you know Him, and put your trust in His Son Jesus’ death for you on the cross, in payment for your sins. God, the Father, accepted this payment, and signified it by raising Jesus from the dead. We serve a living LORD and Savior!
Our Sovereign God Orchestrates Uniquely Created Life Events
Have you ever had to tell or write your life story? I recently had this experience, and had to present it in 12 minutes! Since I’m not young anymore, I’ve had a lot of life experiences! Choosing which were significant enough to share and how they impacted what I do here at Your Home For God was a valuable exercise! But, it’s impossible to know how each small event (and big) played into making you the person you are and how the Holy Spirit has worked to make you the person God wants you to be. And it’s a process that won’t end until that instant we die and we go to live with Him in heaven, and we are instantly perfected by Him!
Every relationship and experience that you have ever had in your life, or will ever have, good or bad, is one that He made or allowed to happen (this is definitely a mystery, but God is Sovereign and in control of all things), and God can and will use all of them. He has a purpose and a plan to use us to bring glory to Himself and to make a difference for His kingdom in this world. That much we know. He desires that we impact people for Christ, tell them about Him, and teach them about Jesus. If we will yield to Him, and allow Him to do it, He will bring people to Himself through us. This is what gives me goosebumps.
What Difference Does That Make in Your Prioritizing?
I have put together Checklists for Consistent Daily Routines to help you have consistency in your Morning Routine, including spending time in God’s Word, and Consistency in your Evening Routine, including a time of prayer. I have also created a Bundle of Resources, called, Prioritizing God’s Unique Goals For You that walks you through the process to know who you are created by God to be, and to figure out what those priorities unique to you and your family are, and to begin to set goals to get you on track prioritizing what’s important, and show you how to be consistent in them! As I went through my 20’s, 30’s, and 40’s I struggled so much with prioritizing! I copied and compared myself to others. I was inconsistent, disorganized, a procrastinating perfectionist, overweight, and besides that I was a people-pleaser. But, God was in the process of changing and teaching me, and now my passion is to help others like you.
I help young Christian moms find out who God uniquely created them to be. When I got to know Jesus better, and then discovered who He’d created me to be, it was well, nothing short of life-changing. Have you discovered the freedom of not having to compare yourself? Do you know the joy of not having to do “all the things” that everyone else thinks are so important? Have you stopped trying to be someone else? You can–and so can I, praise God! Why should you try to be like Sally, Lisa, Sarah, Amy, Emily, Beth, or Jami? Or anyone else, for that matter. You can stop trying to measure up to their perceived gifts and stop trying to match their personalities! They have their purpose in life, their own opportunities, and life circumstances, their trials, their joys and sorrows, and you have yours. You were created uniquely! And so was I! And, that’s more than ok! That’s His Perfect Plan!
You were given specific gifts and talents, experiences, (the good, the bad and the ugly, even) that God knows you will need to mold you into who He wants you to be and to make you usable for the purposes He has for you. Some of the worst experiences I’ve gone through–like ovarian cancer–have been tools God has used to open up doors of opportunity for me to minister, to help others, and to give me empathy for their problems.
But, on a day-to-day basis, you don’t have to be the amazing cook, bargain-hunter, organizational genius, or the wife or mom or influencer that someone else is! Hallelujah!!! Isn’t that an amazing and freeing thought? What peace that gives! Let’s look at our priorities in life, our routines, our plans, our purpose, in light of Who Jesus Christ is, and who He made us to be.
You Can Stop Comparing! You Are Completely and Uniquely Created!
You don’t have to, and in fact, God doesn’t want you to have the relationship with Him that your friend has! Again, let that sink in! If you are envious of someone’s spiritual life or seeming closeness to God, know that God wants a relationship with you that is amazing. But it will be completely unique. He wants to have a very special relationship with you. He desires to draw you closer to Him, make you more like Him, and bring glory to Himself through you, and have pleasure in you. It’s important to prioritize that relationship! And, keep your eyes on Jesus.
Another fact of life that is a good thing is that there are no two relationships alike because there are no two people alike. So, you will get to know God in a uniquely-created-you way. And, the building of that relationship is also a part of a plan for your life that is not going to look like anyone else’s! Let’s rejoice in that, and praise Him for it! I hope it encourages you to think of that as much as it does me.
God Has No Intention Of Your Going It Alone
We were designed to be in families and we were designed to be in relationships. All through the Bible He talks about truths that He then made analogies to in our everyday lives such as: being born, growing up, marriage, intimacy, giving birth, families, sisters and brothers, children, home, and more.
God designed us to need others, to work together, to depend on one another, to disciple and mentor our children and others, and to be discipled and mentored and learn from others, too. We’re not perfect, and we won’t be perfect until we see Christ in heaven.
So, He’s working on us to change us, and He uses people, as well as His Word and the work of the Holy Spirit, to do that, through their teaching and example. Paul, in 1 Corinthians 11:1 even told his readers to be like him and follow what he was doing. “Be ye followers of me, even as I also am of Christ.” This takes wisdom and discernment, to follow what is good and right, without copying or coveting another person’s life.
Discipling is one of the reasons I started Your Home For God–to help, teach, encourage, and mentor you! My passion is to help you know without a doubt how uniquely created you are by God, to help you know Jesus better and have a deeper relationship with Him, to help you find your purpose, to have clarity on what your priorities should be, and to learn to set S.M.A.R.T. goals that you will achieve, for God’s glory.
I say it this way on my blog: “I help young Christian moms have clarity and consistency prioritizing God’s unique goals for their home, family, and life, through courses and coaching.”
I’ve walked this road, been where you’re at, and learned things that will help you. The road to consistency and prioritizing what’s truly important for God’s glory can be found! The Checklists I’ve created will help you and also the “Prioritizing God’s Unique Goals For You” is a bundle of resources designed to walk you through this process with the ultimate goal to make Your Unique Home–your spiritual life, your physical home, your family, and your life–For God, for His glory and pleasure!
You are Uniquely and Wonderfully Made!
Have a Great Day Making Your Home For God!
I help Christian women get organized and have clarity
to consistently identify and prioritize God’s unique
goals for their life through my courses and coaching.
In Your Home For God’s Store, discover resources to help you get organized, raise Godly kids, and have the support and encouragement to know who you are, know what God wants you to do to fulfill His purpose for your life, and achieve His unique goals for you!
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Wow so thankful at my finger for stumbling into you . in reading your post I can recognize some patterns and believe I can learn so much from your advice.
Thank God for giving you such an amazing talent and thank you for sharing it looking forward to spending more time with you later once again thank you and blessings