BE GRATEFUL FOR TOUGH FEEDBACK AND GROW
“Criticism, like rain, should be gentle enough to nourish a man’s growth without destroying his roots.” – Frank A. Clark
How to Take Criticism. Part 9 in the Series
Strength matters. Having a strong heart, soul, mind, and body, by loving the LORD with all those, helps people be more successful and better able to cope with the ever-changing aspects of life. There are lots of ways to build strength, but the best may surprise you–it is through adversity.
I talk about this a lot. You will find your purpose, what God has uniquely created you for, through the trials you experience. You will find your strength through what you have to fight and overcome! As Christians, we must expect trials. I believe we are going to experience more opposition and persecution. Going through challenging things builds physical, mental, and emotional strength, and spiritual growth.
Series on “How to Give and Receive Criticism Like God would want”
- How to Give and Receive Criticism Like God Would Want, Part 1
- What are the Top 3 Reasons People Hate Criticism, Part 2
- 3 Unexpected Ways Criticism Can Make You Stronger, Part 3
- How to Find Success When You Call Criticism Feedback, Part 4
- How to Give and Take Criticism in a Healthy Way, Part 5
- How to Criticize Behavior, Not Character, Part 6
- How to Get Help From Criticism and Not Defensive, Part 7
- What if Criticism Will Help Good Things To Happen, Part 8
- How to Take Criticism Like God Would Want, Part 9
- How to Have a Healthy Relationship When You Disagree, Part 10
- How to Be Humbly Grateful For Criticism, Part 11
You Can Learn to Take Criticism? Pt 9 in the Series
Criticism can help you grow stronger
We understand this better if we compare it to building strength physically. We add weight and resistance in order to build muscle, and get stronger. Little by little, lifting or pressing more weight, builds a stronger body. It’s the same principle in other areas of life.
There’s a tendency to resist hearing and accepting criticism because it feels deeply personal and like rejection. That’s a weak standpoint against a very valuable resource. Feedback can be one of the greatest gifts ever if you learn to be grateful for it!
“Criticism, like adding weight to ‘lift’ can make you stronger!” Wendy Gunn
Once you make the shift from feeling criticized to energized, feedback will become a useful tool. Is that even possible? Here are some tips:
Remember, praise and criticism are simply feedback. They are like data. They can be analyzed and used to your advantage. The more feedback you get the better you can hone in on your goals. Criticism is an indicator of how far on or off track you are when it comes to your plans.
Make Things Right When You Are Wrong Pt 9 in Series
criticism, like adding weight to lift, can make you stronger
Like anything, the more you do it the more normal it becomes. If Christ is our example, we will receive a lot of negative feedback and criticism in our life. It doesn’t mean you’re wrong, or on the wrong path always. It doesn’t even mean that you need to change, always. So, receive it, evaluate it, and thank the person for giving it. If it feels like it’s too much, like adding too heavy of extra weight to lift, and threatens to injure you, make sure you go to the LORD with it, and leave it there. He will help you and carry it for you.
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When we get used to hearing positive and negative things, it will become easier to accept them. Some of us find that It hurts when someone criticizes us, but if we follow Christ’s example, we will respond well, when our pride gets out of the way, and we care more about God’s viewpoint of us than man’s.
Discerning what feedback to Reject helps
There are all sorts of people giving feedback. Some of them are worth listening to and others aren’t. Being able to discern who you should pay attention to and who to reject helps make you stronger. There’s power in knowing who is critiquing you for the right reasons and who is simply out to wound you.
How to Take Criticism. Part 9 in the Series
Giving tough feedback helps you receive it
Once critical feedback is part of your self-improvement plan and you get used to it, you’ll see the benefits. This will make it easier to offer high-quality critical feedback, too. The more you offer criticism in healthy ways the easier it will be to give and receive. You will know the difference between high-quality criticism and criticism designed to tear people down. This will help your interpersonal communication and relationships greatly.
Welcome criticism as feedback without sensitivity
Making the shift from avoiding criticism to welcoming it is huge. We often hear this described as developing a thick skin. This is important to teach our children. An over-sensitive approach to life will not make your child a strong Christian, or a strong person, and definitely won’t help them be more usable by God in this world.
They will constantly be tempted to bitterness, anger, resentment, and their relationships will never have the opportunity to develop deep roots. You want to train your child to be obedient to the Word of God, to see God as their strength, so that they can weather the storms of life that are inevitable.
Make Things Right When You Are Wrong Pt 9 in Series
Develop a tough skin
They must learn to take criticism without getting their feelings hurt. They must learn to go to God, evaluate what has been said for truth or error, and be willing to change, if necessary. A mama who rises up like a mama bear to defend her “baby,” no matter what age they are, and promotes an emotional response to all attacks and pain, is weakening her child.
Understanding the value of all critiques—good and bad—will help you thrive. Learn to embrace giving and taking criticism as part of a healthy way to develop a tough skin. Toughen up, and train your child to do so, too.
Click to Get Your Free Pretty Printable Scripture Cards. Use them all over your house to draw your family closer to the Lord!
What to Do When You Don’t Agree With a Critique
We’ve spent a lot of time learning how to give and take criticism like God would want. Being kind when delivering a critique and being humble when receiving one are at the top of the list for how to behave when giving and taking criticism. There are times when criticism is warranted, but there are times when it’s not. What do you do when you don’t agree with criticism received?
What if the criticism is from an authority
Managing criticism you don’t agree with can be tricky. If someone has authority over you, there is an implied expectation that their feedback outweighs your opinion of it. In other words, their expectations supersede your thoughts about it. If there is a law, we are to obey it (unless it violates God’s law).
A company policy or expectation is the standard…even if you don’t personally agree. We are experiencing issues related to Covid in 2020 where each Christian person and family must respond as they see fit according to their study of God’s Word, and after much prayer.
Click to Get Your Free Pretty Printable Scripture Cards. Use them all over your house to draw your family closer to the Lord!
Romans 14 seems to have words that apply, which God led Paul to write, though he is talking about other actions:
“Let every man be fully persuaded in his own mind.
6 He that regardeth the day, regardeth it unto the Lord; and he that regardeth not the day, to the Lord he doth not regard it. He that eateth, eateth to the Lord, for he giveth God thanks; and he that eateth not, to the Lord he eateth not, and giveth God thanks.
7 For none of us liveth to himself, and no man dieth to himself.”
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Criticism may be just my opinion coming out. Who are you to judge your brother? Let every man be fully persuaded in his own mind. But, let all obey the Word of God. When one has sinned against the truth, there is a time to speak criticism. However, speak the Truth in love.
Wendy Gunn
“
As christians, let the unity of christ prevail
And these words should guide us, as Christians:
“But why dost thou judge thy brother? or why dost thou set at nought thy brother? for we shall all stand before the judgment seat of Christ.
11 For it is written, As I live, saith the Lord, every knee shall bow to me, and every tongue shall confess to God.
12 So then every one of us shall give account of himself to God.”
I may be offensive to you, my brother, but I must answer to God. I must seek peace with all men and seek not to offend, but the most important is that I am not offensive or disobedient to God. And, we, as families, must be fully persuaded in our own mind.
Click to Get Your Free Pretty Printable Scripture Cards. Use them all over your house to draw your family closer to the Lord!
This is Part 10, “How to “; click on the links below to read more in the series!
Read all the posts in the Series on “How to Give and Receive Criticism Like God would want”
- How to Give and Receive Criticism Like God Would Want, Part 1
- What are the Top 3 Reasons People Hate Criticism, Part 2
- 3 Unexpected Ways Criticism Can Make You Stronger, Part 3
- How to Find Success When You Call Criticism Feedback, Part 4
- How to Give and Take Criticism in a Healthy Way, Part 5
- How to Criticize Behavior, Not Character, Part 6
- How to Get Help From Criticism and Not Defensive, Part 7
- What if Criticism Will Help Good Things To Happen, Part 8
- How to Take Criticism Like God Would Want, Part 9
- How to Have a Healthy Relationship When You Disagree, Part 10
- How to Be Humbly Grateful For Criticism, Part 11
Have a Great Week Making Your Home For God!
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